One of the biggest mistakes I’ve made in life is to stop participating in martial combat sports after college, and not picking it back up again until my late 30’s. I’ve since participated in Kempo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and am now heavily involved in the latter, training 3-5 days a week and competing in tournaments.
By martial combat, I mean any sport involving physical imposition on a competitor. This would obviously include martial arts (i.e. Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, karate, etc.) but would also include boxing and various forms of wrestling. Hence why I’m using the term martial combat sports and not just martial arts. A man’s life will be lacking without martial combat sports in it.
Martial combat is an essential function of man from the beginning of time. Certainly the Bible, but all ancient works, generally include references to the martial combat feats of men. The men of a society were expected to train in various methods for the defense of their homes. For good reason! The history of the world is basically the imposition of one group’s will upon another. Society has therefore demanded that men train in an effort to be ready for attack, whenever it may come. Your family and community, likewise, depend on your readiness for defense.
You see this in several famous examples. Wrestling and boxing in Greece, various famous martial arts from China (i.e. kung-fu, Shaolin fighting styles, etc. ) and those from Japan (judo, jujitsu, swordsmanship, etc.) are probably the most famous ancient examples. When you look deeper, there existed martial arts in every civilization, and you’ll find diverse examples from African, Indian, Russian, and Native American societies, among others. Some of these martial arts involve weapons, some not. The ultimate purpose was the same. Train young (and older) men in the society to be ready for armed combat should the need for protection of the society arise.
The rise of the state, slowly over time, has issued an odd disconnect. The common man has outsourced his protection to military and police apparatuses at the expense of his own sovereignty. If we are attacked by a foreign threat, we send the Armed Forces. If there’s a robbery, you call the police. We don’t feel the NEED to defend ourselves, as a first response. There’s someone else to do it for us.
This leads to problems. Since we outsource our protection, we lose control over its aims. Hence we see long, drawn-out wars fought in other countries, generating a never-ending cycle of animosity between Americans and foreign people who (absent their respective states) would have no grievances against each other. We see laws enforced, and people imprisoned, for crimes that hurt no one (except themselves). That’s not to mention the lesser frustration of getting speeding tickets for going a speed we know is safe. There’s an ever-growing cycle of dependency that extends beyond physical protection to economic protection (the welfare state), emotional protection (safe spaces), and equity protection (the “woke” movement). Its origin is the lack of self-sufficiency we’ve developed as communities. As it relates to defense, the fault rests solely on the shoulders of men. We can’t even defend ourselves, how can we possibly defend our families, communities, and nation?
This leads to personal issues in personal and business relationships, especially as it relates to other men. Deep down, we know that conflict resolution may ultimately end up in a physical confrontation. The neighbor complaining about your kid’s ball going over the fence, the co-worker who shirks responsibilities off to you, or the panhandler asking for money. These are all seemingly innocuous situations, but deep down every man has a gut reaction that things could go south in a hurry. Self-defense training, for some reason, gives one an extra sense of calm in these everyday situations that the untrained man lacks.
How about the jerk saying something rude to your wife on the street, or the crazy driver who tailgates you for some accidental grievance on the road, or the drunk guy who brazenly cuts ahead of you in line at the convenience store? I think we can agree it’s probably not best for you to automatically escalate these situations to physical violence, but shouldn’t you correct the rude behavior? If you’re not sure you can defend yourself, how can you possibly correct the situation without putting yourself at obvious risk of injury?
Now escalate a little. What about the mugging attempt while you and your wife are out on a date? What about the break-in home invasion? What about the psycho who opens fire in the mall when you’re shopping? Obviously, these situations call for additional armament (which I’ll get to in a second) but the concept is the same. Absent any sort of self-defense training, you’re at the mercy of evil. No cop is coming to save you. You can’t outsource immediate self-defense needs, even if you fool yourself that you can.
The better trained a man is in some form of self-defense, the more self-assured he will be in everyday life. While you may (let’s hope) never be robbed or subject to a home invasion, self-defense will provide you confidence that you can navigate evil in this world in a much better fashion. You’ll also make the community around you a little less susceptible to danger. Suffice to say, if every man took this advice, we’d have no logical need for the state to provide police protection in our communities, for the betterment of our neighborhoods.
Self-defense training has other benefits as well. I notice that I’m more confident and assertive with other people. My negotiating skills have improved. I also notice that my focus at work improves significantly on days where I roll jiu-jitsu beforehand, noticeably more so than when I just run or lift weights. I can go on, but suffice to say there are significant side benefits to martial combat sports beyond self-defense training. I think martial combat sports offer a connection between physical training (i.e. lifting weights, running, etc.) and educational training that somehow enriches both. I find that I learn better and train better because I’m participating in jiu-jitsu.
So, how do you get started? First, you’re going to need to pick a martial combat sport. Far from a conversation about which one is best for self-defense, you should consider a combination of factors including (a) self-defense applicability; (b) tournament availability; and (c) community.
The truth is, with few exceptions, most martial art will work for self-defense. Arguments go back and forth as to whether straight boxing, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, various karate forms, Krav Maga, or {insert your favorite martial art here} are the best. However, the truth is all the forms listed, plus dozens of others will do. Most self-defense scenarios you run into will involve untrained attackers, and evening the odds can be done with a variety of martial combat methods. More important is whether the form suits your tastes and is something you’ll stick with. Also, note that there are many facilities, like MMA gyms, where you can participate in a variety of art forms to see what you like best. Just remember that it’s probably best to focus on one method eventually. There’s an old saying that I’d rather practice one move 10,000 times than 10,000 moves one time.
You need to pick a martial combat sport that offers competitive tournaments. There’s a couple of reasons that tournaments are so important, no matter your age. First, it offers a purpose and seriousness to your training. My buddy at jiu-jitsu (a white belt in his 40’s like me) just signed up for his first tournament. He described that it sets a deadline for his training, whereby he needs to learn some passes and a submission or two in the 6 weeks remaining until the tournament. Second, it forces you to eat and lift appropriately, since with weight classes there’s a benefit to being strong while lean. Don’t worry if you’re older, because tournaments will usually offer age divisions.
Finally, it’s important to pick a sport with a good community that suits you. You’re not going to continue to go and train if you don’t like the people around you. This means you may need to try a few places until you find the right crowd for you. Your training is a journey, and you want to make sure you’re taking that journey with the right people, otherwise, you’re likely to quit.
I picked Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and I think that’s currently the best place to start, and I’ll give you several reasons. First of all, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu or BJJ is an amazing self-defense tool. It lacks striking, but you can easily make that up by hitting the back and setting up sparring sessions with your buddies. I recommend doing so with boxing gloves and football helmets on your knees for safety. The great thing about BJJ is that because of the lack of striking, you can go 100% in training sessions without significant risk of injury. It’s also extremely popular, with a ton of schools you can choose from. I believe it also is the most popular in terms of tournaments, there seems to be more and more popping up each year, so you’ll be able to test yourself. Finally, the community is really great, and the schools I’ve been to all have a wide variety of men and women of various ages working hard to better themselves. Again, most martial combat sports can work, but if you don’t have a preference, I’d suggest you check out Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
I’m going to now transition to thoughts on firearms. First of all, I think it’s the responsibility of all men to be armed and ready to defend your community against threats. I think the mass shooting epidemic in the U.S. is tragic, and I think some of it would be prevented if mass shooters operated under the assumption that people would shoot back if they opened fire in public. So yes, you should be armed, carrying concealed, and ready if called upon.
That being said, I am insistent that men should train a martial combat sport in addition to carrying concealed, and that being armed is (a) no substitute for self-defense training and (b) will be enhanced by self-defense training. Most of us aren’t able to train shooting often enough to become extremely proficient shooters, and spending significant time in military-style stress-simulated training is unrealistic for most men. In addition, most situations are best handled with non-fatal self-defense techniques as opposed to shooting someone. You also will not get most of the benefits of martial combat training listed above just from packing a gun. Finally, the stress management afforded by self-defense training would be very useful should you run into the need to pull your weapon. Make sure you practice shooting and develop accuracy with your weapons, but the reality is that martial combat sport training is needed as well, and is more important to your overall development as a man.
You can’t reach your full potential as a man without martial combat sports training. It’s time to find and join a gym. If you’re a father, it’s crucial to get your sons and daughters involved as well, especially as they enter high school. I would consider football (or rugby) a martial combat sport, but otherwise, kids need to participate in self-defense training. This is important at any age, but particularly so for young men in their 20’s, who have a tendency to get soft after high school or college sports are over. Martial combat sports will help avoid this and are worth keeping up as long as you can. There are guys in their 60’s at my jiu-jitsu school, and I’ve heard of guys rolling into their late 80’s. It will keep you young, strong, and focused. Do it!