It’s interesting to see how concerned we tend to be about the actions of others. We comment on the actions of others on social media, gossip about the actions of others to our friends, and consume media commenting on the actions of others (particularly politicians, athletes, and celebrities). We think we have all the answers and espouse political philosophies with comments about the way the world ought to be.
One would assume that we do so because we are perfect, but that’s really not the case, is it? The fact is that we all have significant sins and shortcomings that demand our attention. But isn’t it so easy to ignore our own faults, and focus instead on the supposed malfeasance of others and the world-at-large?
This external focus is better known as your opinion. Your opinion covers two broad areas, let’s call them micro (focus on the actions of a single person or small group of persons) and macro (political opinions). We tend to express our opinion in a variety of manners, and social media platforms have made it easier and more socially acceptable to express our opinion.
Micro Opinions: Critiquing Others Behind Their Back
People express their micro opinions in the form of critiques of other persons. A very rare, but extremely respectable version of this, is to go to a person and directly criticize them, assuming your critique is legitimate. Jesus actually does this a lot. He’s got the guts to call out sin and hypocrisy and do it right to people’s faces. We could all stand to follow his example, because if the fault of the other is so pronounced we need to say something to their face, it’s probably worth saying. “If your brother sins, rebuke him, if he repents, forgive him” (Luke 17:3). Pretty simple stuff.
But we don’t do that, do we? In reality, we generally talk behind the backs of others. When we talk behind people’s backs, we tend to get REALLY brave with our opinions. We also say things that are pretty stupid in the big scheme of things. Again, if you had to say it to someone’s face, it’d probably be a pretty big deal, right? A major problem with talking behind people’s backs is that it gives us the ability NOT to address issues that truly affect society. After all, if the person you’re talking about is truly sinning, how can they repent and become a better person dauntless you say it to their face? Content to gossip, we don’t address wrong behavior head-on. Adopt a policy of refusing to say anything you’d be uncomfortable saying to a person’s face. The world would be a lot better place if we all did that. Instead, make a conscious effort to address real problems with the people in your life, with compassion and love. Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Proverbs 27:5. If you can’t say it to their face, don’t say it.
Online micro opinions are EXTREMELY interesting, because it almost acts in reverse of talking behind someone’s back. In fact, you will actually say things online to someone that you would NEVER say to them in person. It’s odd, to say the least. Sometimes you’ll even say this stuff to one of their actual friends, or at least someone from their local community.
What’s incredible is that someone will post a seemingly innocuous question, and instead of answering the questions, other people will criticize the poster for some unrelated reason. You could ask “where’s a good vet for my labrador retriever”, and without fail someone will respond “I can’t believe you would buy a full-bred dog rather than go to the pound and adopt”. It’s incredible to me that the poster of such a reply wouldn’t think to themself (a) should I post this; and (b) should ANYONE care what I have to say.
Let me focus on what I mean by should anyone care about what you have to say. Jesus says the following:
Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye. (Matthew 7:3-5)
This is some very powerful advice about your opinions. Before you concern yourself with others, take care of your own problems.
How much do you focus your attention on the faults of others and ignore your own? More to the point, what are you doing about your own problems? Are you independent, or are you a burden on your parents or society? Are you adding value as an employee, or are you constantly lazy and expendable, stealing time from your employer by consuming social media instead of working? Are you a good husband, or if unmarried someone a worthy woman would consider marriage-material? Or are you too busy playing video games and watching porn to add any generational value to society?
The point here is to limit your critiques of others, and focus on yourself. Let your actions speak, rather than your words. Everytime you’re critical of others, you may think you’re winning, but you’re not. First off, this takes your focus off your own faults and sins, because it allows you to focus on others. Some readers may be too young to remember the Jerry Springer show, but it had a fascinating allure to watchers. Mr. Springer would have oddball losers on his show, with massive self-destructive lifestyles. Cheating spouses/significant others were his bread and butter. The show was wildly popular. The reason people watched the show, it turned out, was because watching stories about these losers made them feel better about their own lives. Any focus on the shortcomings of others removes the focus from where it belongs, on you. Don’t let that happen.
Again, a good barometer of whether you should espouse a micro-opinion is whether you’re willing to confront and address the sins of the other person to their face. If this is not the case, you should keep your opinion to yourself. Gossip is harmful to society, and it drags you down as well. Worry about yourself, and be very careful about espousing your opinions on the actions of others, especially if you’re not willing to do it to their face.
Macro-Opinions
On to political opinions, which are what I’d classify as “macro-opinions”. Social media has become the great equalizer, allowing anyone to post on political matters. You can post your opinions to generate responses, and also respond to the posts of others. Your opinions can be in the form of ultra-short thoughts that don’t even have to be coherent. There’s no barrier to entry, as there was in the past, of requiring you to go through the effort to write a book, develop a radio or television talk show (and generate sponsorship revenue), have a reputation (and earning potential) worthy of a newspaper column, etc. You, Joe Nobody, can enter the fray with your political opinions.
My commentary here has two components. I’m going to focus on social media posts, but these thoughts apply to your interactions with individuals and groups as well. First, obviously, you should follow the same general thought process described above when thinking about posting ANYTHING political on social media: (a) should I post this and (b) should ANYONE care. Another component would be when you decide to address someone else’s political opinion. Your thought process here should be: (a) should I care; (b) will I influence or change anyone’s mind; and (b) is there ANY value to what I’m about to post.
My point in this article is that you SHOULD be asking yourself these prior to putting forth your opinion, either in person or online. If you truly thought through these questions, you would likely behave completely differently. You would likely come to the conclusion that NO ONE should care about your micro or macro opinions. As such, there’s absolutely no value to you or I engaging in personal or online discussions about our opinions. Your online behavior should change significantly based on that thought process.
This is particularly true given the transition of online fights to “mostly-peaceful” protests over the course of the last year. Every night on a variety of news sources, you can see young men talking about “fights” for a variety of social issues. They protest this, that, and the other thing. They battle against supposed foes on the opposite end of their political spectrum.
Yet I wonder how many of these young men are financially independent, goal oriented, and looking to add value to society? How many are ready (or becoming ready) to lead a family and raise healthy, Godly kids. Not very many, judging by their sloppy appearance, sophomoric language, and aggressive tone. The truth is we are all sinners who could stand a little humility and internal focus. Again, before you complain about the speck in our neighbor’s eye we should pull the log out of your own.
A much better way to make your opinions felt is through your actions. You should earn the respect of others through your life, legacy and integrity. You should only be giving your macro opinions when directly asked, rather than do so unsolicited. You will advance your cause much more by first warranting the respect and admiration of those around you prior to espousing anything. Also, political opinions are very similar to gossip when thrown online through social media, as opposed to discussed openly, to the other person’s face. People say things online that they would NEVER say directly to the face of another person. That should clue you in that online political conversations are toxic and should never be engaged in. Say what you have to say when directly asked, in person. This is the only way you will ever have any positive output regarding your macro-opinions on politics.
Summary
To break it down, here’s a few rules when thinking about how to express your micro or macro opinions:
- Say what you’ve got to say to the person, not to others or online.
- Think about whether ANYONE should care what you have to say?
- Worry about yourself and your own actions first.
Pretty simple stuff.